The double edge of forgiveness

Take a moment and think about the word, “sorry“. What a wonderful word it is! What a healer he is!

What emotions does an activity like this awaken in you? Do you think it fills you with a feeling of sweet security and well-being? Your conscience is clear and you have peace knowing that nothing is held against you. Can there be a word that more clearly expresses or encapsulates the love of our Heavenly Father? However, forgiveness has two sides.

Remove the end of the word and you are left with, “forgive“. Now, suddenly, you are on the other side of the situation. Your emotions change as you contemplate whether or not you are willing to let go of all the hurts you have held on to for years. Intense feelings arise and constrict your throat and possibly your breathing. Fear, anger and rage fill your entire being. FORGIVE? How dare anyone suggest such a thing!

Forgiveness is often the last hurdle before we enjoy our healing. We have a hard time forgiving those who have hurt us because we think that forgiving means saying: “i’m on bread“. Or we think that forgiveness means,”let them off the hook; let them go with itYou rationalize that your offender does not deserve your forgiveness. He has not come to you and asked for your forgiveness. Why would God command you to forgive someone so vile?

We want them to suffer as much as we do. Pride or fear often get in the way of forgiveness.

We are asked, rather commanded, to extend to our offender the same mercy that our Heavenly Father has extended to us.

Delete the first part of the word, “forgive“and you stay “to give“. The word, “to give“medium”free gift.“In giving a gift, you expect nothing in return. A gift cannot be earned or paid for. It is an expression of love and mercy. We are never more like our Heavenly Father than when we extend mercy to someone who could never repay us for the mountain of emotional pain he or she has caused. God loved you so much that he gave his only Son… (John 3:16)

Surrender the entire situation to God and let Him deal with your offender. He has said, “Vengeance is mine, I will payHe has your back. He is on your side. He wants the best for you. He knows that as long as you hold on to this bitterness, you will have to deal with one health problem after another. Toll. You will never reach your full spiritual, emotional, mental, physical, intellectual, or productive potential. Trust that God will give you the grace to forgive if you commit to doing his will.

Crucial to forgiveness is the understanding of what it means to genuinely forgive and what it does not.

Forgiveness is not:

• Forgiveness is not just ignoring pain.
• Forgiveness is not forgetting the painful incident.
• Forgiveness is not declaring that the other person was right or that what they did was right.
• Forgiveness is not allowing the offender to control your life.
• Forgiveness is not to say that you have overcome the pain.
• Forgiveness is not to say that you forgive, while avoiding the offender.
• Forgiveness does not mean that the offender does not have to pay the consequences of his actions.

Forgiveness is:

• Forgiveness is more for your benefit than for the benefit of your offender.
• Forgiveness means that you are more interested in understanding why something happened than in getting even.
• Forgiveness states that the offender no longer owes you anything.
• Forgiveness means that you are more concerned with moving on with your life than being controlled or restricted by your past.
• Forgiveness frees you to move forward in the healing process.
• Forgiveness opens the door to God’s blessing in your life.

Forgiveness, although very difficult, is essential for emotional healing.